✨"The suffering is silent and we don’t talk about it, but know others feel your pain."
✨"It took 20 months before I became pregnant and the entire time we hid it from everyone. It was the most difficult thing I’ve ever done."
✨"Once I was in it, I suddenly learned of dozens of friends and family members who had been affected by infertility too."
✨"I really did this process on my own. Though now I wish I would have joined a community."
✨"Stop asking us when we’re having kids!"
Meet Lymarie
SOLaRA
Warrior Name: Solara
Solara, from the Latin sol meaning "sun," symbolizes warmth, resilience, and light after darkness — all qualities Lymarie has come to embody. Her fertility journey was long, painful, and largely private, carried without the support of a community. But through it all, she found the resolve to keep going, and eventually, to share her story. As Solara, she represents quiet endurance and the courage to speak up so others feel less alone. Her strength may not shout, but it shines — steady and fierce — with the power to ignite hope in others.
Lessons Learned: Infertility, Silence, and the Support That Was Missing
When Lymarie began trying to conceive, she never imagined the road to motherhood would stretch on for years — let alone become the most difficult chapter of her life.
After five years of trying, she and her husband decided to seek medical help. The results were life-altering: natural conception wasn’t possible. IVF would be their only option.
What followed was a physically demanding and emotionally exhausting process. There were months of doctor visits, labs, ultrasounds, and medications. Before implantation could even happen, Lymarie had to undergo several procedures to prepare her body. It took 20 months before she became pregnant.
And the entire time, she and her husband kept it to themselves.
The Loneliness of Infertility
What Lymarie didn’t realize early on was just how many people were silently enduring similar pain. Only once she was deep in the experience did she begin to uncover the truth: she was far from alone.
This discovery changed the way she viewed her own experience. It didn’t erase the pain, but it reminded her that there was a quiet, invisible community walking a similar path.
Finding Strength in the Everyday
Staying emotionally grounded during fertility treatment is no easy feat. For Lymarie, finding small joys was key — whether it was spending time with loved ones, revisiting hobbies, or tending to her mental health.
“Do what makes you happy.”
It was this effort, however imperfect, that kept her going during the most uncertain times.
What She Wishes She’d Done Differently
Lymarie went through nearly every step of her fertility journey on her own. She didn’t rely on books, podcasts, or community groups — and now, that’s her biggest regret.
To others just beginning their journey, she encourages seeking support early. Whether it’s through forums, therapy, or shared experiences, finding your community can make all the difference.
To Friends and Family: Please Stop Asking
Some of the deepest wounds didn’t come from procedures or test results — they came from careless words.
Even well-intended phrases like “It’s God’s will” or “If it’s meant to be, it will be” often caused more harm than comfort.
Lymarie’s message is clear: support doesn’t mean fixing. It means being there for someone without trying to fix, rescue, or minimize their experience. It means listening. Being fully present, compassionate, and nonjudgmental for someone else — especially during this time of pain, uncertainty, or vulnerability.
Sharing to Heal, Helping Others Feel Less Alone
Lymarie chooses to share her story not for recognition, but to give voice to the pain so many carry in silence. To remind others navigating infertility that their pain is valid, their strength is real, and their story is worth telling.
Because even though the journey is difficult, isolating, and often invisible, no one should feel like they’re walking it alone.
Gems for the journey
Don’t Go Through It Alone — Find a Community Early
Seek out support groups, online forums, or fertility-centered communities early in your journey. Connecting with others can reduce feelings of isolation and provide emotional validation, resources, and encouragement.
Protect Your Peace — Prioritize Mental Health and Joy
Make space for things that bring you peace and joy. Whether it’s time with loved ones, creative outlets, or therapy — actively tend to your emotional well-being during the ups and downs of fertility treatment.
Set Boundaries — Educate Others on What’s Helpful
Don’t be afraid to set clear boundaries with friends or family. Let people know what kind of support you need — and what isn’t helpful. It’s okay to protect your emotional space while advocating for compassion and sensitivity.